Come On Grandad, Its time for a Ride

Tour of Kentmere

25 June 2004

This ride was an adaptation of a ride from MBR, and starts from Staveley in Cumbria. Gary Davies has become a grandad for the first time on Monday, and its surprising the change i have seen in him since then. His whole outlook seems to have changed. Simon Retford, me, Gary Davies and Haydn Roberts set off from Wigan at 8a.m. It was supposed to be 7a.m but Gaz was having trouble getting up,so we left it a bit later.

We were in Staveley at 9a.m ready to go, i helped Gaz out of the car, changed him into his riding gear and helped him onto the bike. He sat there for a minute or two babbling to himself about incontinence pads, but we told him there was a crown green bowling club down the road, and it seemed to kick start him into action. I had loaded the route into the G.P.S and was telling Simon how we would not be needing his map reading skills today.... Just sit back relax and let technology take over. I switched on the unit, it tracked 6 satellites from outer space, fixing our point on the earths surface to within 10 feet. Pretty impressive eh?. I went to the route screen %&*(*(* the route has been erased, out with the map, and Simon was in the hot seat again, Bloody technology, the GPS went straight back in the rucksack. With all the delays Gaz had wandered off and was asking members of the public if they knew a good place for a whist drive, i brought him back and we were off on our way. It was a glorious sunny day and the first uphill passed by without any problems.

There were stunning views over to Applethwaite common and we negotiated the steep rocky downhill into Kentmere Hall, Gaz hit a rock and split his tyre, i found him wandering around in his slippers saying "What shall i do, im to old for this game now". I mended his puncture, sat him back on his bike and give him a push to get him started, once he got up to about 30 M.P.H down the rocky descent i could'ent hear him whinging any more, so i presumed he must be enjoying him self, Bless Him.

After a stiff climb on tarmac Simon took the wrong turning and we had to go back and get him, then a good technical climb over Stile End, led to a steep rocky downhill. Gaz got a text message from his care worker which seemed to perk him up no end, he came skidding down the hill with a smile as big as a brickies pay packet. Simon was recovering from a cold and was coughing all manner of wonderful coloured sputem up, but he kept going. A brilliant section of grassy singletrack followed, and a big push to Skeggles Water. Then it was a blast across Staveley Head Fell on narrow winding singletrack, before we knew it we were back on the road and into Staveley.

I took Gaz off the bike and sat him in the front of my car, i told him i would get him ready when we had put the bikes away. The next time i looked the poor old sod had undressed himself and was sitting in the front seat completely naked. Jesus Gaz get some clothes on pal, you look like an ordanance survey map of the Himalayas, he'd gone all wrinkly overnight!! . I got him dressed quickly and we took him for a walk round the bike shop.

A beautiful dinner in the Eagle and Child and a Pint of Bluebird Bitter rounded the day off nicely. Had a good day Gaz, Simon asked? "Why, where have we been " said the old timer. I took him back to the car and put his seatbelt on. Then we were off home on the M6. Before we got to Kendal Gaz was fast asleep, i kept wiping the slaver from his mouth, and fondly brushed his grey hair, thinking of times when he was younger and knew what was going on around him.

As we got off the motorway at Chorley i gently said " Come on , old timer wake up we are nearly home" He woke up and said "Have i been asleep?". I didnt have the heart to tell him

"No mate, not for long anyway, well soon have you home"

As i dropped him off at home he said "eeeehhhh its good to get back home".

I pulled away with a tear in my eye, what a grand owd lad and remembered what TROTSKY once said.....

Old age is the most unexpected of all the things that can happen to a man.