bikesandpies

Real Ale Wobble

15th-17th November 2003

Five of us set off for the annual homage to bikes and real ale again this year, Simon Retford, Gary Wade, Gary Davies ,Chris Burrows and a virgin wobbler Ian Withers.Cameron Hackett was due to come but had a problem with his mother in law!

We left Wigan about 1p.m ,and in just under 4 hours we were pulling into Llanwrtytryd Wells with the expectation of another classic weekend, taking in the legendary hospitality of the fine welsh women of Llanwrtyd Wells. This year we had managed to arrange town centre accommodation for everyone, although Ian told us his room was a converted dolls house, and he kept bumping into the lightshade .....with his chest!!

As in previous years we were mindfull not to drink too much on the friday night, so we had a hearty meal, the obligatory Neuedd curry, then settled in for a few beers. Simon is suffering from sleeping sickness, so at 10.30p.m he bade us farewell and went to bed. Undeterred by this Gary Davies started to sink the real Ale like it was going out of fashion, quickly followed by Ian, who bravely went onto pints of scrumpy. Gaz has a disorder known as Beer Louditis. This condition is not unusual, but is highly amusing to the onlooker. The sufferer starts the evening as a normal person, and then starts to drink Real Ale, the more Ale he consumes, the louder and more obscene his language and behaviour becomes. The interesting thing about this disease is that the sufferer thinks he is acting in a completely normal manner, and cannot understand why everyone is looking at him. At the end of the evening when Gary was suffering badly with the disease, Ian Looked at me and Said "Where the F*$* did you get your mate from. I tried to tell Ian , but the sound of my voice was drowned out by Gaz Shouting "Brilliant, play it again mate" at the singer.

I managed to drag Gaz back to the B&B, we planned to raid Simons room, de bag him and throw his bedding out the window, but we were foiled by a cunning trick he had played on us to thwart our fun,. no doubt gleaned from his short time with the serious and organised........He had locked the door!. I went for a quick wee, came back and saw Gaz flat out on his bed, fast aslep. Good result, i thought he would be ill after so much beer. I settled down in my bed next to the sink, just as i was dropping off, gaz came thundering across the room, fell over my bed and started to be sick into the sink. Just what i needed, to add insult to injury he then proceeded to break wind, whilst sitting on my bed. I found this very funny and fell asleep laughing.

The next morning i woke up, it was a beautiful day for a ride, i looked over at Gaz, and thought he had been drained of blood during the night. He said "Did i make a fool of myself last night Gaz, i get the feeling i made a complete idiot of myself" Dont worry mate it was not you fault, i told everyone in the pub you were suffering from Beer Louditis, so dont worry you are ill, ill help you through it. This seemed to make him feel better, it was just the horrendous hangover he needed to get over now.

We had a full english breakfast and set off for a fantastic days riding in the forests. After the first climb of the day , Gaz nonchalantly leaned over a fence and brought his breakfast back up.After that he seemed to buck up no end. Ian was finding the riding hard but very enjoyable. As we came down a steep grass banking i heard the shout, "Hang on , bikes broke"

As i looked round i saw Ian walking down the hill carrying his bike, the front wheel looked like it had been through a mangle. Apparently he had gone head over heels and crushed the bike. Simon said to me "Get a picture of that Gary". I thought good idea Si, a 19 stone ex marine has just fallen off his bike and ruined his wheel, he will have to walk back to town on his own, and you want me to take a picture of him.........I DONT THINK SO. As luck had it we were a short distance from a beer stop, and Ian got a lift back into town, the rest of us carried on the ride.

We teamed up with Ian in the Town about 3.p.m and decided to have just one beer in the Stonecroft, before having a kip. 3 pints later we stumbled out, and arranged to meet up at 8p.m. The band in the Stonecroft were excellent and the atmosphere was electric,with over 150 real ales on offer and names likeAzza Newt, Golden Whippet, Bitter & Twisted, Foxs Nob, Good Old Boy, Lady Of The Lake and many many more there was a long night ahead of us it was so exciting that at 9.30p.m Simon announced,"Im going to bed now, ive only had 20 hours sleep in the last 30, i need my rest.. We carried on at the Stonecroft, Chris left about midnight. Myself, Gaz and Ian stayed a bit longer. We ended up in the Neuedd standing next to some local girls, 2 of them were smoking at it was coming our way. Gaz politely asked them if they could blow the smoke in the opposite direction. F*&% off was the reply, and the 3rd Lady then lit up and proceeded to blow more smoke our way.

Ian had nurtured a few local beauties over the weekend and arranged to meet the in the Belle Vue, he left to speak with them about 2.a.m, so we decided to go back to the B&B. "Wheres the key Gaz" .i said. "thought you had it "..................... Sleeping Beauty had taken it with him , and we were locked out. We went back and started to throw stones at Simons window, no joy. I luckily managed to get a signal on my phone , as i was persuading him to get out of bed and let us in, Gaz was in the background shouting , "COME ON MR SERIOUS AND ORGANISED GET OUT OF BED". We stood at the front door like a pair of 12 year olds late back from the school disco. Simon let us in, and went back to bed.

Sunday morning saw another glorious ride, Ian has got the cycling bug, and was talking about getting a new bike for next year.WE all left the town feeling tired but refreshed........if that makes sense?

Home Coming Up Equipment Event Archive Ride Guide Links Cafe Stop Pictures	Real Ale Wobble 15th-17th November 2003 CLICK HERE FOR MORE PICTURES Five of us set off for the annual homage to bikes and real ale again this year, Simon Retford, Gary Wade, Gary Davies ,Chris Burrows and a virgin wobbler Ian Withers.Cameron Hackett was due to come but had a problem with his mother in law! We left Wigan about 1p.m ,and in just under 4 hours we were pulling into Llanwrtytryd Wells with the expectation of another classic weekend, taking in the legendary hospitality of the fine welsh women of Llanwrtyd Wells. This year we had managed to arrange town centre accommodation for everyone, although Ian told us his room was a converted dolls house, and he kept bumping into the lightshade .....with his chest!! As in previous years we were mindfull not to drink too much on the friday night, so we had a hearty meal, the obligatory Neuedd curry, then settled in for a few beers. Simon is suffering from sleeping sickness, so at 10.30p.m he bade us farewell and went to bed. Undeterred by this Gary Davies started to sink the real Ale like it was going out of fashion, quickly followed by Ian, who bravely went onto pints of scrumpy. Gaz has a disorder known as Beer Louditis. This condition is not unusual, but is highly amusing to the onlooker. The sufferer starts the evening as a normal person, and then starts to drink Real Ale, the more Ale he consumes, the louder and more obscene his language and behaviour becomes. The interesting thing about this disease is that the sufferer thinks he is acting in a completely normal manner, and cannot understand why everyone is looking at him. At the end of the evening when Gary was suffering badly with the disease, Ian Looked at me and Said "Where the F$ did you get your mate from. I tried to tell Ian , but the sound of my voice was drowned out by Gaz Shouting "Brilliant, play it again mate" at the singer. I managed to drag Gaz back to the B&B, we planned to raid Simons room, de bag him and throw his bedding out the window, but we were foiled by a cunning trick he had played on us to thwart our fun,. no doubt gleaned from his short time with the serious and organised........He had locked the door!. I went for a quick wee, came back and saw Gaz flat out on his bed, fast aslep. Good result, i thought he would be ill after so much beer. I settled down in my bed next to the sink, just as i was dropping off, gaz came thundering across the room, fell over my bed and started to be sick into the sink. Just what i needed, to add insult to injury he then proceeded to break wind, whilst sitting on my bed. I found this very funny and fell asleep laughing. The next morning i woke up, it was a beautiful day for a ride, i looked over at Gaz, and thought he had been drained of blood during the night. He said "Did i make a fool of myself last night Gaz, i get the feeling i made a complete idiot of myself" Dont worry mate it was not you fault, i told everyone in the pub you were suffering from Beer Louditis, so dont worry you are ill, ill help you through it. This seemed to make him feel better, it was just the horrendous hangover he needed to get over now. We had a full english breakfast and set off for a fantastic days riding in the forests. After the first climb of the day , Gaz nonchalantly leaned over a fence and brought his breakfast back up.After that he seemed to buck up no end. Ian was finding the riding hard but very enjoyable. As we came down a steep grass banking i heard the shout, "Hang on , bikes broke" As i looked round i saw Ian walking down the hill carrying his bike, the front wheel looked like it had been through a mangle. Apparently he had gone head over heels and crushed the bike. Simon said to me "Get a picture of that Gary". I thought good idea Si, a 19 stone ex marine has just fallen off his bike and ruined his wheel, he will have to walk back to town on his own, and you want me to take a picture of him.........I DONT THINK SO. As luck had it we were a short distance from a beer stop, and Ian got a lift back into town, the rest of us carried on the ride. We teamed up with Ian in the Town about 3.p.m and decided to have just one beer in the Stonecroft, before having a kip. 3 pints later we stumbled out, and arranged to meet up at 8p.m. The band in the Stonecroft were excellent and the atmosphere was electric,with over 150 real ales on offer and names likeAzza Newt, Golden Whippet, Bitter & Twisted, Foxs Nob, Good Old Boy, Lady Of The Lake and many many more there was a long night ahead of us it was so exciting that at 9.30p.m Simon announced,"Im going to bed now, ive only had 20 hours sleep in the last 30, i need my rest.. We carried on at the Stonecroft, Chris left about midnight. Myself, Gaz and Ian stayed a bit longer. We ended up in the Neuedd standing next to some local girls, 2 of them were smoking at it was coming our way. Gaz politely asked them if they could blow the smoke in the opposite direction. F*&% off was the reply, and the 3rd Lady then lit up and proceeded to blow more smoke our way. Ian had nurtured a few local beauties over the weekend and arranged to meet the in the Belle Vue, he left to speak with them about 2.a.m, so we decided to go back to the B&B. "Wheres the key Gaz" .i said. "thought you had it "..................... Sleeping Beauty had taken it with him , and we were locked out. We went back and started to throw stones at Simons window, no joy. I luckily managed to get a signal on my phone , as i was persuading him to get out of bed and let us in, Gaz was in the background shouting , "COME ON MR SERIOUS AND ORGANISED GET OUT OF BED". We stood at the front door like a pair of 12 year olds late back from the school disco. Simon let us in, and went back to bed. Sunday morning saw another glorious ride, Ian has got the cycling bug, and was talking about getting a new bike for next year.WE all left the town feeling tired but refreshed........if that makes sense?